What it means to "fit in"

My well-meaning sister advised me to get J tested to see if he would be eligible for OT or PT services from the state. It took me some time & I finally agreed, only after being at peace with it. That was almost 2 months ago that I called, within a few weeks we had the screening and then the evaluation. They told me he's eligible to get therapies, due to the fact that he's not walking at 19 months (wasn't yet at the time) and not talking, he doesn't speak to people he doesn't know well. They did hear him babble a little though.

In the last few weeks so much has changed. J started walking, he's using sign language, speaking some words, brings me things he wants & more. Many of theses things we had made as goals for the therapies he was already doing. So I was very curious to see what this woman would do today.

She was puzzled as to what she could do for us & told me to be very proud, that I'm doing great with J, all of her suggestions we already do & that it was great that I was able to give him time to develop in his own way. She said she will still continue to come to help us with whatever skills we are working on, but I have a feeling that she's going to have him testing soon to see if he still qualifies. He wasn't far off to start with.

So what has changed? Was it me or him? Well both and neither at the same time. He's growing, and changing mostly on his own, I model the things for him that I always have, he's just much more interested in doing work - I use the montessori principles at home with him. I have always used my intution and follow his lead, making sure to set up situations for him to help him further develop and explore his current interests.

I have to say that felt really good today. I'm so happy to have had these experiences, they teach me so much. At the eval I noticed him doing things that he had not been doing for me, and realized that he had picked them up, just not shown me yet & also did things I had never shown him. He also didn't do things for them that he does with me all the time, he doesn't like to perform, and when he started getting comfortable with them he did more and more.

So you may wonder, why am I writing this. It is for the other parents who may be in the same situation. My son has a very strong will & I have always known that he needs to do things in his own time, only then will he blossom. So even though he may not be doing the things other children his age are typically doing, that's ok. I pay attention to what he DOES do, and much of that are things that other children aren't doing, and may not ever do.

I want him to be comfortable with who he is, and follow his intuition, sensitivity, sixth sense & so on, things that we don't normally focus on in our society, because we are taught to ignore them, that those aspects of us are useless, so we lose them. Well for me, and in the experiences I've had, I know how important they really are for everyone.

Labeling a child as slow, autistic, handicapped, etc. is sometimes a major disadvantage, not neccesarily to the child, but to the world. Whenever a child is born "different" than the norm it means that they have different abilities that they want to focus on. They are born knowing there purpose here, we judge it because most of us adults have forgotten, but, thank GOD!, I have remembered. So the gifts they came to give US, may take much longer to be realized, or even appreciated, if at all.

So next time you try to compare yourself or anyone else to the "normal standards", maybe you'll ask why & look deeper, finding what IS (instead of what isn't).

What we've been up to

It's been a little while since I've been on here, we've been so busy enjoying life, so here's a recap!

Joshua is now 7.5 months new, he's growing and changing everyday, it's amazing, he's got 3 teeth now, he's had a taste of watermelon, avocado, bananas, lettuce, apples, & cucumber, or more accurately he's licked them, lol. I've come to see that breastfed babies develop very differently in the eating department. Joshua likes to lick fruits, and not with teeth he likes to bite when he's got some activity happening in his mouth, but he's not interested in eating or swallowing food. We decided not to puree his food, so when he is fully ready and capable of eating then he will. Any food (besides breastmilk) he swallows just comes right back up, so I know he's not ready. He never took to a bottle for many reasons, so whenever something is his mouth he discovers it instead of swallow it, it's fun, he really is a conscious eater, he takes in everything in his environment. So many other developments happening with him, he baby talks, and does lots of hand signals, i'm sure i'll learn them soon enough. He loves to jump, crawling is in the beginning stages, he scoots backwards.

As for mommy & daddy, we've been learning & growing sooo much. We are truly becoming a multi-media company with Maureen. I'm grateful to the website Lynda.com for the awesome training videos, I pick up on software programs very fast, but having these trainings really takes it to the next level for us. Axiom (Maureen's company) is developing so fast, even though it seems like sometimes it's a slow process sometimes in the overall view - wow we are flying! I've heard about people like ford, disney & others who did what we are doing, and how we are going through what most people do who are developing major businesses that shift society as we know it. I tell people I work with the disney of consciousness, & I know one day soon Axiom & Maureen will known worldwide. Pretty exciting to be positioned here, and I do know that it's because we really are conscious people, living with intent, love, & gratitude. Communing with God is creating with God!

Well that's the quick of it, more to come....

6 months pregnant, pictures

here are a few pics taken over the last 3 weeks.

23 weeks

24 weeks

25 weeks taken 6/28

25 weeks (so is it a boy or girl, haha)

The Tibetan Book of Living And Dying

My quest for understanding death has lead me to reading a book i've had in my collection for a while. The Tibetan Book of Living and Dying, by Sogyal Rinpoche.

As mentioned in my post about Bubba I talked about the beautiful presence of Bubba in the big beautiful cloud that was beaming with light, highlighted with light, and full with lightning, also the heart was bright glowing red.

In the book stage 2 of death

"...the radiance of that nature of mind is displayed and shines out in appearance of sound, colors & light."

An interesting experience in life

In my mind I know death and sickness are an illusion, as is pain. So I wait, for the answer to what is the truth, where is the peace, if this is an illusion then what is real? Right now i'm experiencing this in my world, the death of my dog, the sickness of my friend, the sadness and drama of people close to me. It all leads to peace, I know it, and i'm ready to experience that peace.

Bubba Clinton Libman

Bubba Clinton Libman
8-15-92 - 6-10-07

Bubba snuggled with the Libman family on this earth for many years. Known as the cutest dog ever Bubba lived a very long and happy life, and now he will continue to live in our memories.

Thank you Bubba, for being my doggie-bro, and always being so loving and fun.

You are loved





these are pics of Bubba with my sister and her boyfriend who gave him a very loving home these last few years. You see he mastered the art of sleeping & snuggling & being so darn cute!

UPDATE: On the evening of Bubba's passing Chris & I took a walk on the beach at sunset, a cloud to the west grabbed our attention. When we were able to get a clear view we both saw Bubba in the cloud, running, ears back, and the cloud had lightning in it, I could see his ears, head, paws and heart - the heart was bright red. It was a beautiful moment for me, thank you Bubba.

I continue to dream about Bubba and feel his presence, every moment is joy.

Celebration time!

Chris is officially a college graduate. Excelsior College evaluated his transcripts, they told him he was eligible for a Bachelors of Science in Liberal Studies, all he needed to do was take a 1-credit course, that can be done at his own pace online. Well that course is complete! And now it's time for a celebration! I'm going to have a little party for him next week!

Congrats Chris!!!!

Shifts in Consciousness

These past few days my body, mind, spirit, needed a rest. My family was around the whole weekend, it was an emotionally trying time, due to some conversations I didn't care to be a part of. In the end I opened up and they eased off, so I have much more of a state of peace with them. Thank god! We all need to express our fears and more importantly express our true needs, and I know that is what they are doing, however being pregnant, i'm very sensitive, i'm open to discussions, however these conversations have been more about the fears they have, and pursuating me to go into a fearing place. Deep down it comes from a loving caring place, I understand that. I'm glad now they understand that I know what is right for myself and my baby. So it's taken me a few days to adjust, my nerves really needed a rest, so i've been sleeping, and yesterday my body only wanted juice, orange juice and then mango, oh yummy. Today my appetite is returning slowly. I've also had a head-body ache, which is is almost gone at this point.

Just something to think about, if you have a conscious person in your life, who is pregnant, or even not, and is making decisions that you may not necessarily agree with, do a little research, or talk with some others who have the same views as this person, so you can at least have a better understanding. We all dont need to agree, as we all truly have our own paths, however, no matter what your path is, peace and love come from honoring all paths.

In these last few days i've had some really vivid dreams, conversation with my baby. conscious living is my way, I feel even more of a need to honor that! So i've made a few shifts in my choices, I know they will be very beneficial to the pregnancy and birth.

Pregnancy Update

Less is more! That is the theme of my life these last few years. That's what's coming up more and more in most recent experiences. I'll be sharing interesting information in the blog, as I always do, and i will a bit more quiet about my personal information.

Time to get back to raw, Pregnancy week 13.5

For the first time in over 10 years I vomitted last night. What a way to start a post huh. I had some pasta just before headed to Temple Adath Or with Maureen, she was speaking during the Sabbat service. Well the pasta was just too much, and once I walked outside and got in the florida heat my stomache was in pain. A few hours later it finally all came up, what an evening. My entire rib-cage and back was in so much pain, being my muscles haven't been used like that many times in my life, I sure felt it.

I haven't been eating all raw because it was getting motion sickness with any fruit or vegetable that I ate. So the amount of raw has gone down these last 2 weeks, and it's sure time to get back to it.

This morning I woke up feeling much better. I went out to the beach to breathe in some nice fresh air. Had a little water and part of an apple. Going to be taking it ez today. My energy level is good. I was even considering going to bellydancing class this morning, however, considering this would be the first time, I think i'll wait till tommorow or next week, when i'm not so sensitive, and in need of rehydration. Also if I go somewhere that has smells that wouldn't be too much fun.

Tonight is artwalk in miami! Going to join my sister and her boyfriend walking around the area, going from gallery to gallery. I love art. Postsecret will be doing a display, my sister is very excited about that, she posts her favorite post secret every sunday on her blog when they come out. http://gettingtomaybe.blogspot.com/ SO taking it ez today would be best, then I will be able to go for the ride and walk.

Sunday is farmers makret time here at hollywood beach. Thank god for Josh - he has a juice named that too, because is so appreciative of what he has. It's a wonderful time for us to see our friends, especially Frank, our best friend. He is in the process of creating a music demo that is being given to a major recording company, i'm so excited for him!

Happy weekend :)

Week 13 - Pregnancy and life is a Joy!

This past week has surely been one of fun and insight. We completed a really great presentation for Maureen, it was so much fun! We are also moving her websites over to a new server, all the play we have with Maureen is fun, work for us is play, we really enjoy it.

Yesterday was a beautiful day of syncronistic events. the book Unassisted Childbirth came in the mail. Which brought me to some soul-searching. I feel so right about this, that my body knows what it is doing, it will guide me through a joy-full pregnancy & birth. Chris and I started visualizing the birth. And every moment that I can I continue to visualize all of the wonderfulness in my life and to come. Listening to my Whole self, I, is a great space to be in.

I spoke with a local midwife this morning, who was very receptive and open to what I had to say, I told her that I would love to develop a relationship with a midwife for when I needed to ask question or some support. She gladly respected my decisions and welcomed me to call her anytime.

I accept joy, grace, abundance, ease, love & peace in my life NOW!

Here's a fun one, I was on the beach yesterday with chris & I said I accept grace & abundance in my life now. As we set out the blanket he handed me his wallet and I saw a few 20's loose, so I opened it up and 100 dropped into my hand. At first I questioned him as to where this money came from, thinking maybe he just didn't get the chance to put it actually in his wallet, and he didn't know, so we laughed and said, yes, grace and abundance, thank you!

Pregnancy - Motion-sickness

Hey what happened here? Yesterday I ate a pear and then I felt like i was on a boat. My tastes have changed from sweet to salty! And also I was loving eating fresh fruit - raw fruits and veggies are most of what I eat, now I just don't want it. I wanted tomatoe, all though i wanted it cooked, the sound of raw just didn't appeal to me, and eating raw is not settling in my stomache. I hear that there is a height in the end of the first trimester where sickness and all that gets intense, I guess since I didn't have any of that I'm getting a little now.

I tried this ginger-ale, it's organic and "natural" - YUCK, it was like drinking straight ginger with a load of carbonation, for someone who only drinks water or tea this was way too much for me. So Chris makes me lemon ginger water, it's wonderful. And today for lunch I had a vegan organic pizza - middle earth pasta sauce, tortilla wraps & follow your heart vegan mozzerella. It really hit the spot. I'm feeling so much better today than I did yesterday, especially after an evening and morning of massage! Chris has just the right touch for me.

I have energy too! Today I'm making a fun presentation for a restaurant conference, and I've looked at hundreds of photos of people eating food, YUM! Sure brought up my appetite.

And in the next week or so we will be going on a little vacation with my sister and her boyfriend, key west baby! I'm excited about going to the natural beach just before key west, what a beautiful spot, and going to the Wyland gallery. Oh yeah there is also a photographer that has a gallery I believe down there, he's awesome. The party scene is not my thing, so it's good to know that key west has something for everyone!

Pregnancy - Week 12

Today is week 12! My little one is a full formed human being, that's just amazing. Baby is starting to secrete bile and practice digestive tract movements. That would explain why my elimination has been easier these last few days.

My energy is increasing, my appetite has slightly increased. I still nap from time to time, and I can stay awake all day if I like - I love napping, it's wonderful.

I sure have the glow, my hair is growing very fast and my nails are extra strong.

My husband is doing great too. He's so in love! He's already being a daddy, it's cute, i feel blessed.

Just spoke to another midwife in the area, going to meet her on tuesday. She was very easy to talk with, she's vegan! I told her about my intentions and feelings and she was good about it all, she told me which tests she would require me to take, and some other info. Well see how this goes.

Unassisted Childbirth

I woke up this morning with a deep connection to my emotions, which is typical for me, however, I came to a new level of awareness on what I really want.

This past sunday I went with my mom and husband to a birthing center, that decision was made so my mother could have the opportunity to expand her awareness, ask her questions and release some of her fears. I made a statement to the midwife that if I had it truly my way I would not have anyone in attendance at my birth (except my husband), my body knows what it is doing, and I trust myself. As I said these words I felt emotions coming on, my eyes started to water, because I spoke my truth, I was authentic to myself, and felt WHOLE.

During my visit a few days prior with another midwife I felt like a power struggle was happening. Over the phone this midwife was great to talk to. She agreed with what I was saying, and we both enjoyed the conversation. In person it was very different. Most of the time she talked about different tests that she is required to give me, and that I have the option to sign a waiver, etc... When I began to speak she would hear a few words and then start speaking about the subject, I felt like I wasn't being heard, I didn't have questions, I just wanted to see how in alignment we really were. If you have seen the Celestine Prophecy movie (if not I highly recommend it) It was like the moment when the man - John, met the woman, who he had seen in his dreams, he unconsciously was trying to take her energy, this is what people do in our society, I see it as a call for love, yet at the moment when it's happening it can be a challange to see through.

In these last few months/years, I have awakened to many truths, and continue down this path in love and light, knowing that all of the illusions of fear and power are just illusions, and that I can create what I want. I also know that everything in my life is perfect, it is all set up so that I can further awaken to truth.

So here is my truth. Birth is a normal part of life, and all of life is to be cherished and celebrated. When someone asks me what i did today, I say I celebrated my day doing/being... I did not need anyone coaching me through being vegan, or conceiving a child, my inner guidance has brought me to the true joy and freedom that we all have. So why should pregnancy and birth be any different.

My husband agrees, he held the space for me today to cry and release, all the hurt and pain I had from generations of unconscious doing. I feel compassion for those who believe that they are victims, and that they need someone else to tell them what is right. Your only truth is your own. We are all very different and all need to find what is right for each of us, in all aspects, love, food, education, etc... This is what soul-full or conscious living is about. We have freedom, we have choice, even if we are not yet aware, we always have it.

I began to have the discussion with a family member, about the fact that women have been giving birth and going through pregnancy unassisted for millions of years. My intention was to open her up to any decision I would make, be it having a midwife or not, I create ease and joy in the experience. It was a prefect opportunity for me to see where I have attachements to her, and her approval. Interesting huh. I forgive myself for believing that I am responsible for her happiness and that she effects mine. Allthough she expressed conflict, fear and some other emotions, I remained calm, and continued to express as myslef, while giving her love and compassion. What i see out of this, is that the old pattern, of fighting, is gone, and I can be with a situation authentically and in peace.

I have been ready through some really great resources on the web about lotus & unassited childbirth. Should I decide to have a midwife, or anyone else at the birth, it is my choice, and I know it will all be perfect.

http://www.unassistedchildbirth.com
http://www.purebirth-australia.com/
http://www.lotusbirth.com/

A wonderful book Primal Mothering in a Modern World: by Hygeia Halfmoon

UPDATE: My family member was much easier to talk with later in the day, in all fairness she was tired, and had a long few days - holidays. So I told her, the situation will be perfect and comfortable for everyone, and she said, I know, you know what your doing... Ahhhh

6 degrees of seperation or divine intervention

So time to get a little personal, I know the 1 reader I have to this blog really loves that, haha, ok i know there are about 3 of you! Thank you for continuing to read, and if you are new to this blog, welcome!!

So 2 days ago I get an email from this awesome man, asking about creating a character for his website. He got my info from the editor of the magazine we design. Well in talking to him we made a great connection. chris & I are so excited to be part of this, yet I had no idea how deep this really went. You see I have a family, who we are very close with, and I'm in the process of designing the website for them. it's going to be awesome! They are a non-for profit and are involved in some amazing things, I'll talk more about them in another post, when the website is developed i'll be sure to share. Well one of the main things the mother of this amazing family works with this man also works with, and i didn't even realize it. The next day after talking to him about his website I kept picturing this family in my mind, so i asked if they wanted to be part of the project. Then i called him and asked him what he thought about it. That's when we figured out the link between the two of them.
I can't even come close to describing how wonderful this all was! Such an amazing event. I was able to connect two people who are both doing something amazing for civilization and can really help each other out.

I can totally see some part of this being on Oprah. I even had the vision of the family on Oprah, with chris & I back stage, hmmm who knows maybe we were waiting to be interviewed as well! Anyway this is going to be BIG!!! for everyone, i just know it. The best part of it, is that what's being creating is soooo GOOD for everyone, even you!

I have such amazing friends, and i discover more and more of them every day. I love life! I love being the creator of my amazing life.

thanks for sharing in my excitement! I know i haven't given the information on who these people are, and much of what i said is vague, however it will all come out very soon, and i would rather wait till the right time, for now I just want to put it out there and say THANK GOD, lets celebrate, smoothie time

We have landed! Ahhh back in Cali!

Just got in last night. It was a long but fun trip. Have sooo many pictures and so much to blog about, right now just going to take a little time to rest up and enjoy being back home!

Our route
start: Jupiter, FL
-Clearwater, FL - visited chris's family, got to meet some more relatives. Little haley is so adorable, and smart, it's amazing how much babies change in 1 year, seems like everyday they are so different.
-Meridian, MS - to visit our friend kareen, got plenty of fun baby time with her 2 little ones.
-Jackson, MS - stopped at the food co-op!
-Chicago - hung around the city for the day, then met up with our friend JC who started her trip in florida, then NY/Cleveland, and met up with us outisde of chicago with 2 cool guys headed to alaska.
-Iowa - stopped for the night in a travel gas stop, i'm mentioning this because it was so nasty, u can smoke indoors in iowa and people took full advantage, yuck.
-Omaha, NE - where my mom first moved to when she came from Israel. I must say i was impressed, it was much more than i expected! Very vegan friendly
-South Dakota - Badlands, camped over night at the enterance, and then took the quick route towards mt rushmore, the rain and thunderstorm set us off towards yellowstone
-Yellowstone national park - camped just before the enterance by the shoshone river, it was such a beautiful place, waking up to the sound of the river, watching the wildlife and the way the morning sun plays on the moutains. Yellowstone was a little rushed, we did get to see Old faithful and some wildlife.
-Grand Teton NP - just south of yellowstone, it was a beautiful drive
-After some scenic driving said see ya to JC, Dave & Ian - who headed to portland.
-Salt Lake City, UT - Very vegan friendly town, except the smoking, we wanted to take a shower and sleep in a bed, so we found a hotel that was listed in the redirect guide (eco-concious resource guide to the area). It was so not eco-friendly, they have a cigar bar in the lobby, which gave me a huge head-ache just for the the few moments i was in the lobby, so we decided to hit the road. Before that we stopped in wild oats, and got to take in some sites from the car, it was late so we stopped at sage cafe for a bite to eat, then the hotel and then headed for nevada
-Nevada - we forced ourselves to get to nevada before passing out - because of the bombing ranges in utah. We stopped at the grossest rest stop, but got some good sleep!
-California - ahhh we are home. The drive was beautiful, u know when you are in cali because the scenery changes so much. It goes from dry and flat with mountain in the background to driving on the mountains, seeing lakes and green and wildflowers... Stopped at an RV place and saw the new Winnebago c-class that is diesel, so tempted to buy it ( a little late for this trip though)
-Oakland, CA - stopped for a bite to eat
-San Jose - after visiting our friend Laurie and her new boyfriend we headed to Jim & dave's, unpacked and passed out.

Now it's morning and we are starting to settle in! Lots to do so when we get situated i'll be back to share details and pics

So What do you think of our New Ad?

I posted it on the top of this page!


Feedback please!

Business update

With so much going on with starting up a new business (and lots of traveling lately), i've been a little too busy to update the blog, but then again i'm not even sure if anyone is reading this, so if u are, please leave us a comment!

The business is starting, this week we will get our occupational license. Soon the new website will be complete, chris is doing an aweome job. Our next choice is how to accept payments, we haven't found any eco-responsible companies/banks to work with, so if u know of anyone please do let us know.

In addition to the store we are providing our design and other services. We currently have a few websites we design, and living nutrition magazine. We plan to many of the books/products on the living nutrition website as well.

Starting to get wholesale info from some great companies, we might even be able to sell furniture! So far we are looks at moslty clothing but so much more is opening up to us, that we will have a great selection of everything eco. Some other items i'm looking into: recycled paper & stationary, sustainably harvested wood accessories, bamboo clothing and bedding, organic tea, raw food, kitchen items, eco-glass, natural bedding & mattresses, publications, green certificates, alternative power, housewares, garden supplies, seed exchange program, reuseables, cd/dvd cases, hemp plastic, eco-computing, and so much more.

If you are a wholesaler of anything eco-vegan, please do contact us!

Update on website

These long nights are paying off. The website now has more content. What is up is only temporary, as we are working on a really nice website, this one was done really quick.

Chris is still working on figuring out the business info, once he does he'll post it.

I'm not sure if I can actually sell anything via the website until we get all the paperwork done. But if your interested in anything than contact me.

I can sell the arbonne stuff, that has nothing to do with the business. I am an independant arbonne consultant. i'll write another post about that in a minute.

I put up some other random items. And a recycle bin! which has new, like-new and gently used stuff. Because recycling items is o-so-eco!

I also have a few organic clothes.

Enjoy
L

A little bit about us.. random thoughts

So you know we are vegan, currently residing in jupiter, fl. Married couple, aspiring to start up an eco-vegan store.

Here's some other info about us
We design Living Nutrition magazine.
Lori has a degree in commerical art and one in computerized design/aeronautical engineering. Yup a vegan aeronautical engineer, strange mix huh. Well that all started before I was vegan. I've been wanting to start our own business for a long time (need to get out of that industry) - so i'm very excited to have this started. Until I do, I figure i'm in it for some reason, if even i can inspire more environmentally friendly aircrafts to be made, or offices to start recycling, i've done something!

-today we registered our business name! We are official.

-Chris was an avionics electrician, student, and now is a loving husband who has the pleasure of desiging the magazine, websites, and is in the process of learning so much more about animation/graphics, etc... he's also an amazing chef (raw & cooked vegan food). he continues to amaze me with all of his abilities, he's now able to explore his creative side and comes up with some amazing food, designs, ideas, animation, jokes, etc.... ex: he knew nothing about magazine, or the software, but picked it up very quickly - he want from knowing nothing to designing the magazine wonderfully in a matter of DAYS!!!! he's going to achieve some amazing things in his lifetime, he already has! I look forward to every moment with him!

-we have moved more times than i care to mention, but it's all been a fun adventure. No we aren't running from something, i've been contracting. here's some places we've lived in (most more than once) Connecticut (Fairfield-New Haven area) , Virginia (for like a week - we hated it), Florida (broward/plam beach counties) San Jose California, Big Island of Hawaii (that didn;t last very long :( . Before we met - Meridian, Mississippi, NY (Long Island and NYC) Clearwater, FL, Sicialy-Italy. And the adventure has only just begun.

-eventually we hope to inspire enough people to living with nature, instead of against it. Then we will retreat to our land, growing our own veganic food, eating what we grow, spending lots of time outdoors, and just enjoying our lives. Until that day comes we are computer crazy, spending way too much time everyday infront of this box. It's all for good reasons, like this business and the magazine. Hey we get to learn some cool stuff too.

-we spend our sundays at the market in hollywood on the beach!
Josh’s Organic Market and Juice Bar
101 N. Ocean Drive, Hollywood, FL
954-456-FARM
(On Boardwalk behind Hollywood Beach Hotel, off harrison)
Market – Sun 9-5:31
Juice Bar Mon-Thurs 7-10pm

-we stay up wayyyy too late, lol.

i'm over-tired, so i'm gonna say - nighty night :) I still have a 9-5er so I need to get a few zzzs to actually be functional in the morning.